21 Totally Bonkers Things at the Olympics Opening Ceremony


by Anna Marquardt
The Opening Ceremony of the Olympics - a spectacle to end all spectacles. Each city that hosts tries to come up with EVEN MORE IMPRESSIVE things to dazzle and delight not only the audience in the stadium, but the viewing public all over the world. Remember when the Spice Girls drove up in Mini Coopers? That was great.

This year's games in Sochi depict Russia's history through dance. Do you like The Nutcracker? How about LSD? Well, get ready for the ride of your life, because this year's opening ceremonies have a hearty helping of both.
1. These sensible jellyfish dancers.
Bioluminescence!
2. These horses pulling THE SUN.
It's a troika! But instead of a carriage, it's the sun.
3. This cloud city.
Lando Calrissian? You in there?
4. This fog featuring people in beautiful Russian costumes.
They brought a cloud inside, basically.
5. These terrifying mascots.
That bear is drunk. And that cat looks like he might murder you.
6. These happy onion domes.
This is where it starts to get really trippy.
7. Seriously, look how colorful they are.
It's like It's a Small World on steroids.
8. This snowglobe held aloft by children in clown suits.
Obviously.
9. This guy.
THE KING OF POGO SHOES.
10. This crowdsurfing little girl.
She nailed it.
11. This floor covering.
Floor projections were used again, and this one matches the rainbow onion domes quite nicely.
12. The entire book of War and Peace, ballet style.
Okay, probably not the WHOLE book. It's a little long.
13. The cogs of revolution.
FEAR THE COGS.
14. These Russian heads.
Pretty Russian.
15. Giant, sickle-wielding Russian heads.
The other one has a hammer.
16. This Train of Industry.
Everything was PRETTY red for a while in the middle.
17. These cheerful cosmonauts.
They love space.
18. These ladies on motorcycles with spears.
Yep.
19. This thing.
Have you ever wondered what you get when you cross The Red Balloon with the Death Star? WONDER NO MORE.
20. These kids who were super impressed.
I don't blame them.
21. And this kid who wasn't.
What do we have to do to entertain you, child?!

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